One of my previous mentors, Ed Desmond, who passed away many years ago, once told me, “Tim the price of failure is always higher than the price of success.” When Ed shared that concept with me over 40 years ago I didn’t have a clue as to what he was talking about. He tried to explain it but as an nineteen year old in my first sales position – what did I know about success, failure and sales – not much.
Over the years I have contemplated this concept in depth and would like to share with you what I know Ed was trying to tell me, but I just wasn’t ready at the time. Having failed a number of times as well as having had some degree of success in my life I now understand where Ed was trying to take me that rainy Friday afternoon in 1961. Let me just re-cap the conversation as I remember it.
“Tim there is a price to be paid for success and if you are unwilling to pay that price you will ultimately pay the price of failure and the price of failure is always higher and more painful than any price of success you are required to pay. You see - the price of success may require; long hard hours, a willingness to learn new skills, the ability to control your attitudes, the development of emotional maturity and the skill to control your fears, anger, guilt and a need to blame and finally the willingness and ability to let go of old emotional baggage that may be keeping you stuck in the past. There are more but these are a few of the basics.
The price of failure on the other hand may cause any number of adjustments, requirements, inconveniences, problems and/or needs in your life or career. For example: if you fail in your sales position because you are unwilling to learn the necessary skills to achieve success, you may cause any or all of the following outcomes. You:
-will have to look for another position
-may have to move from one part of the country to another
-may have to give up some relationships and begin new ones
-may have to start at the beginning
-could lose career progress
-you could lose the respect of friends, family and peers
Well, folks I didn’t get his point until I had experienced my first failure many years ago. But, because of Ed’s guidance and help for those many months, I was able to use that failure as a stepping stone to my next success. Are you paying the price for success or are you one day going to pay the price of failure?
However, I want to be sure that I am clear on a very important point. There is a great deal of potential learning in failure. We tend not to learn much when we succeed. If this is true, than it would appear to make more sense to fail more often in life than to succeed! There is an old saying, ‘fail often so you can succeed sooner’. I am not suggesting that you go out of your way this week to fail, but I am suggesting that if you do, use it as a life, career or relationship tool for getting better or smarter. Sooner or later everyone fails at something. That’s life. But not everyone uses their failures in positive and constructive way. To stretch is to tempt failure. To try something new is to bring potential problems into your life. Sure you can probably avoid most of life’s lessons as a resu
Tim Connor, CSP is an internationally renowned sales, relationship, management and leadership speaker, trainer and best selling author. Since 1981 he has given over 3500 presentations in 21 countries on a variety of sales, management and relationship topics. He is the best selling author of over 60 books including; Soft Sell, That’s Life, Peace Of Mind and The Male Gift Giving Survival Guide. He can be reached at tim@timconnor.com, 704-895-1230 or visit his website at http://www.timconnor.com
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