Move On In A Healthy Way

"We should avoid assuming we know why things happened the way they did, or why people treated us a certain way, or why we did what we did. These assumptions are usually wrong, because we are looking at the circumstances through distorted thinking. Rather than assume, it is sometimes possible to check reality. Often we can test our opinions and see if we are right. Even if we come up with many possible reasons, we still won’t know for certain.  It’s all right to recognize we may never know for certain why things happened the way they did. It’s okay. After examining the experience, we can still choose to move on in a healthy way."

-- John F. Westfall

When You Are Ready To Let Go

"When you are ready to let go of something from the past, it can help to do something tangible that symbolizes the release of the memory. Some people, for example, take small stones to a pond or lake, and with each stone they state a memory they desire to leave behind, then throw the stone into the lake,symbolizing the release and end of that memory’s grip on them."

-- John F. Westfall

In Releasing The Past

"When we choose to let go of the past, with all the resentment, shame, and memories of abuse it brings, we are free to live each day with confidence and hope. Choosing to let go is not the same as denying what may have happened, nor does it suggest it won’t take time and effort to let it go in a healthy way. We won’t forget, but we can forgive. In releasing the past, we release ourselves. When we forgive, the person who is most impacted is ourselves."

-- John F. Westfall

Stop Giving Power To Your Past

"We too can learn from the past, but we aren’t bound by things we have done or not done. We can determine how much of our past will affect us now.  We also determine what aspects of our past we will let shape our attitudes and actions. The past has no power to do anything—unless we give it the power."

-- John F. Westfall

Dwelling in the Past

"Dwelling in the past isn’t limited to recalling painful, negative experiences or memories. We can also focus on good things, celebrations, past experiences, and achievements, and even though they’re positive, they can still keep us from experiencing the joy and freedom of today."

-- John F. Westfall

Learn From Our Past Experiences

"If our goal is to live each day with freedom and joy, we have a chance to learn from our past experiences without allowing them to interfere with the happiness and confidence that come from living intentionally today."

-- John F. Westfall